Friday, January 22, 2010

112. Identify when you are on "Time-Out"

Whether we mean to or not, sometimes we behave in a way that is displeasing to the male of interest. The spectrum of actions which may qualify as "inappropriate behavior" spans anywhere from drinking too much and crying to mentioning he spray tans in front of his friends... and lets not forget the golden oldie: flirting with another guy in front of him. Oops. While these incidents aren't deal breakers (considering where you fall on the hot vs crazy graph) don't be alarmed when your texts and e-mails go unanswered for a period of time.

Neglect is the worst punishment and they know it. Acknowledge your bad behavior and try to learn from your mistakes. Cease attempting to make contact until they give you the go-ahead or it will prolong the torture. Try to enjoy the time away from your situation and concentrate on yourself. Great distractions could be a Millionaire Matchmaker marathon, relaxing facial, or drinks with that guy with the big biceps.

10 comments:

  1. Who do you guys think you are?!

    I would hope you're unbelievable looking models that hook up with celebrities...because that's what you act like. In reality though you're probably two girls who don't pull diddly. You think you know what guys want...but you don't. The reason you don't ever get a guy is because you have done the exact opposite of every 'topic' you write about.

    Boom.

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  2. what a clever comment- Boom indeed! actually, this blog was written for fun/humor- one of us is no longer single, and the other is no longer in san francisco, so neither of us are truly credible contributors to the domain name.

    perhaps we should hire you as a guest contributor!

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  3. Anonymous person, you are still reading the blog. Why? If you don't like it, go to another site. Enough people are reading this that think it's a fun escape from the mundane. Quit pissing on it.

    -Fellow anonymous person

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  4. This blog has entertained me consistently for the last year. I am actually single and probably do over half of the things they say not to do…ahahah go figure! I mean whether you are dating or completely single, no one knows exactly what they want, but we can make fun of ourselves along the way…YOLO.

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  5. Hi Girls,

    I think this is an interesting post. However, this is inherently stupid to begin with. Why would a girl ever do the these things to their "men" when they themselves know that they don't want their "men" to do these things to them? Didn't we ALL learn the "Golden Rule" when we were in pre school?

    To add to the first comment - actions speak louder than words. There have been a number of girls who write about relationships and guys, but in oder to understand the male perspective you need to stop watching Sex in the City and ask a man. Carrie is a fictional idol for woman and is filled with inaccuracies and fairy tales. If girls ever want to please their men, they need to listen to what guys believe and treat them how they would like to be treated.

    A man would tell you that if you do those kinds of things to him, you're lucky if you ever speak again. In stead of getting a facial or watching Millionaire Matchmaker Marathons why don't you apologise in any way possible. If you're giving a guy silent treatment, do you expect him to concentrate on himself by watching Man vs. Wild Marathons and going to strip clubs? Absolutely NOT!!! You expect that poor guy to bring you flowers and write you apology letters and turn himself into a prideless servant until you take him back.

    Long story short - you need to consult a man before you write your posts because you're only leading girls deeper and deeper into the bottomless pit of maleless missery. If you're not careful you'll have to change the title of your blog to "How to date Douchebags for the rest of your life"

    Sincerely,
    Kevin Long

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  6. "The reason you don't ever get a guy is because you have done the exact opposite of every 'topic' you write about."

    So essentially you're agreeing that these posts are in fact good advice by implying you would be able to get a guy if you followed them.

    Ah, the powers of deductive reasoning...

    Unless of course the blog was how to STAY single in San Francisco, but it seems as if it's about dating and finding the right guy.

    Taaahhhooooeeeeeeee

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  7. i think kevin long would cheer up if he got a blow job.

    -- anonymous.

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  8. Pull diddly...that's funny. You Moron. LOVE YOU R&B. Blog rockstars. <3 Court

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  9. I'm not entirely sure what the phrase "pull diddly" means either (are we referring to pulling dates? sex? men? relationships?), but in terms of "getting a guy" I seem to be doing just fine- although he's no celebrity and I'm certainly no model, my boyfriend of 7 months and I are very happy and even taking a trip to the Bahamas next week! Things are going great, thanks for bringing it up!

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  10. Kevie,

    Firstly, I put bitches on time-out all the time; shit, I've got one in the corner of my office with a dunce hat on as I write this. The last thing I need is a girl falling over herself trying to apologize while I'm watching Man vs. Wild marathons and throwing $100 bill paper airplanes at 18 year-old Asians at the Gold Club.

    Second, girls who are wallowing in the bottomless pit of maleless misery are much easier to take down at ESW, so please don't ruin a good thing for the rest of us (not to mention the guys with big biceps who they are encouraging girls to have a drink with).

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